Saturday, February 16, 2008

The Scooper VS MEME

My sister in law and my wife have both "tagged" me with something called meme.
The rules for this meme are: (1) Link to the person that tagged you. (2) Post the rules on your blog. (3) Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself. (4) Tag six people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs. (5) Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.

Since I feel that this is pointless and a waste of time I will not be participating in "meme." Instead I will list out the six reasons why I am refusing to do this. I will then share it with six other people in hopes of stopping this vicious chain.

1. Peer pressure. If I was going to give in to such types of pressure I would have done so back when I was in school. I am a big boy now and can resist the brutal onslaught of emails trying to make me divulge my personal information.

2. Spam. These emails and requests are nothing more than spam chain letters used for information gathering efforts initiated by the others. In terms of spam these emails and requests register over a 52% margin of annoyance.... thus leading us back to #1.

3. Invasion of Privacy. Thats right, all these questions lead to personal information that everyone in the world can use to try and steal your identity. For example, if I were to say that one quirky thing about me is that if I could I would wear a brand new pair of socks every day for life, someone could come along and try and phish me in with the lure of unlimited free socks for life if I just fill out the form. Harmless you say??? Unlimited socks sound great right??? What if I were to tell you that in the form you just filled out to get those "socks" you posted your ssn, pin number, mothers maiden name, eye color, blood type, where you hide the key to your house and when you are going to be on vacation, and favorite type of gumball..... what would you do then??? They would take it all from you leaving you without new socks and worst of all eating gumballs that were NOT your favorite flavor! Scary enough?

4. I'm funnier than youism. Every time one of these types of "surveys" comes out everyone tries to be the funniest. Not because they have to be the center of attention, or "it's" what they are know for. It's because these surveys are so boring and retarded. Who wants to read if I want a tattoo or not? I mean we all I know I want one... those little guys crack me up. But who cares? Look if you were my friend (or family) and you didn't already know that I like to sneak off to the farm down the street at night and spank the pigs... why should I have to think of a funny way of telling you, you obviously don't care enough about me to ask... why do I have to be the clown to get your attention? But I digress, everyone tries to one up each other to be the favorite... I, for one, am disgusted with the whole process and will not stoop down to that level just to be noticed.

5. Mental Monkeys. These little guys are put hard to work in my brain trying to come up with suitable answers for surveys like these. As soon as the request comes in for all this personal information, down go the bananas and out come the typewriters. Those little monkeys in my brain have to work over time to try and come up with "cheddar is better" and answers like that, all the while their potassium levels are dropping. Poor monkeys, why would you subject them to such perils?

6. Time Burglars. This one is worst of all. If you have gone through all these steps and figure the lime gumball tastes ok, and you are just sheep following the sharks, then you have to face the time burglars. These types of questioners don't just take five minutes to fill out. You end up working the mental monkeys overtime, for days, toiling over every last question. You miss meals, work, the bathroom, and for what?, just so your friends can get a laugh or worse, get to know you better. There's no way I will ever waste the time again for such things as "meme" I have so many other things better to do than to post any response to forceful and intrusive emails and requests, and will not bow down to the pressure.

No comments: